havin' a baby

it was almost on the 3rd month that me and my hubby knew that we're havin a baby when i decided to take a pregnancy test myself, whooaalllaaa.. i got TWO STRIPES, we were so happy, glad and so blessed to know that at last we're havin one.

now im on my 6th month this weekend and excited to know if its a boy or a girl. i don't care if its a boy or girl as long as me and my lil pea are healthy.

currently, i'm having minor depression which my friends told me that it's normal coz of the hormonal change im going through with my pregnancy. i hope it will soon be over. i don't wanna go through this crying thing. i don't wanna hurt my baby. i'm also having all sorts of muscle pain all over me but the worse one is the backpain. ppfffttt i really hate it, especially when i travel from home to office and vice versa. it's such a PITA to me. but nevertheless, i have to go through this as this is part of the preganancy. waaaaaahhhhh.. pwede mu.collapse kadali.. heheh

nothing much to say now -- well next week will update you the gender of my peanut. okiks? ciao for now

spiteful you

There's no way that you can please everybody. I've long accepted that, I don't get berserk or throw a fist every time I learned that people talk about me. Rumors will always be the preferred side dish among circles, for others it's even the main dish. One way or another people will always talk about other people. That's human nature and can still be classified as normal. But when do you draw the line? There are people who would cook up stories to indulge themselves. I don't have the license to say that they are mentally challenged but what type of person who would go at length spreading fabricated stories. Surely, not someone whose sanity is balanced and stable.

What’s the objective? To solicit unwavering alliances; or simply mask their bruised pride and rationalize their shame. Someone will always leave somebody. It's inevitable. It's always painful. You can never hide the pain but you can always choose how to act on your emotion. You can move on gracefully or you can be the perfect face of pathetic or downright laughable. I've long been a victim of some people's nasty mouth. But I chose to let it pass for I don't make it my business to give anybody the satisfaction of getting the best of me. I also have my limitation. I get fed up.

Everytime I heard rumors that these people had been stitching about me, my nerves tremble with anger. But there's nothing I could do about it. I couldn't make them stop. Rumors travel faster than the speed of light, but it came to me in installment. It may be old news, but I reached the corner of extreme annoyance. Stories range from a simple lie or cook up to a destructive fabricated stories.

I never even doubted when they extended their friendship, later on I found out you were talking about me behind my back. I did things for them or maybe most of them because I thought I owed it to each one of you. I should've known where you were coming from. And as always some of them twisted the facts and let it appear they were the victim. Did I ever open my mouth lashing you? I kept my mum. I let it go.

There were instance that you guys were so good to me but from the day i found out you're backstabing me. I was disgusted with your wickedness. I hate all of you more for that and how rotten you guys are inside. You all are so sick in the head. I was half in tears writing this because of anger with intense passion.

I'm summing my hatred and anger here. For days I've been praying for the anger that held a portion in my heart. That eventually I can reach forgiveness but I never got there yet. I'm not a coward to hide under faceless aliases. I can get my message across without using the traditional grapevine or creating a bogus face. You know who you all are and there's no doubt this is all for you. This will be my first and last entry about you ALL, scheming $#@%*#&. I know it'll get to you ALL.

I'm writing this to let you All know that we knew how spiteful you guys are. That's something all of you should really be ashamed of. The greatest proof of love is obedience. God I love you but it’s so hard loving our enemies.

Backbiting/stabbing is fleeting but character assassination is another thing.

***

Character assassination is an intentional attempt to influence the portrayal or reputation of a particular person, whether living or a historical personage, in such a way as to cause others to develop an extremely negative, unethical or unappealing perception of him or her. By its nature, it involves deliberate exaggeration or manipulation of facts to present an untrue picture of the targeted person.

** edited post from my other blogsite

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